The Thorns Prediction Game: MD 23 WAS v POR

It seemed a bit surprising that of our three punters only Ken predicted that the second Gotham-Thorns verse would be the same as the first – a draw – though not the 1-1 scoreline.

All three got Wilson as a Thorns scorer, both Dave and Barcasiempre tapped Shaw for Gotham, and Ken and Dave split the storytime points with some wildly imaginative tales from Arkham Soccer Asylum.

So here’s where we stand after Matchday 22; the table has opened up just a bit.

How all this works:
Before the upcoming Thorns match add a comment to this post. As your first line, put your predicted result, for example 1-3 Thorns.

In the body of your comment, start with the goals and assists, like so:
Wilson (Fleming)
Reyes (Free kick)
Moultrie (Unassisted)
Rodman (PK)

Next, name the first yellow card recipient: Sophia Wilson
Then a red card. (NOTE: no points awarded for correctly calling a red-card-free match, so take a guess.) Trinity Rodman for mimicking mooning the referee after getting an undeserved yellow.

Make your fun prediction,and give a “thumbs up” to anybody else’s prediction that tickles your fancy: “Ryan gets the start against her former club. She gets through 70 minutes without fouling her former teammates until she can’t take it anymore. She pushes over Perry, gives Muller a wedgie, gives Arnold a noogie, then flips off the Riveters and runs out of Providence Park, never to be seen again. The ref issues a red card, which she later contests, and loses.” (h/t to ABell4)

Scoring:
· Correct score: 5 points
· Correct result (draw/win/loss): 3 points
· Each clean sheet: 2 points
· Each goal-scorer: 1 point
· Each FK/PK/assist/lack of assist: 1 point
· Goal/assist bonus: 1 point
· Player with the first yellow card of the match: 1 point
· A player with a red card: 1 point
· Most liked/most outrageously accurate prediction: 2 points

Some ground rules and explanations/clarifications (the fine print):
Comments must be posted before kickoff, but you can edit or amend an earlier prediction right up to the starting whistle.

Keep your scoreline predictions realistic. No crazy scores just to pad out your odds of getting goals and assists.

The goal/assist bonus is an additional point if you predict the correct scorer and assistant on the same goal, for example, you say Castellanos scores from a Moultrie assist and that is exactly what happens.

Be clear whether you think a goal will be unassisted, assisted, or from a PK/FK. Unassisted = no assist, run of play; Assisted = player who got the assist; PK/FK = dead ball, not in run of play. FK includes olimpicos from corners. No entry means unassisted.

First yellow means just that: the player – the first player and only the first player – who receives a yellow. Not the first player on each team. If more than one player listed as “first yellow” all the punter’s predictions for that category will be voided.

Tomorrow the Washington Spirit floats into town, surely looking for vengeance for the dreadful home Opening Day thrashing.

Last weekend’s results produced an odd shakeup in the league table. The Gotham draw meant that everyone near the top of the table but Portland had a chance to pull closer to the Bats, and luckily for them their opponents wanted to help, too (or couldn’t prevent them). So Washington thrashed three points out of Bay FC, Utah took three off of Orlando, and San Diego three off of Racing, to cut Gotham’s lead over the Spirit to five and jump all three over Portland, who dropped to fifth.

But.

Utah has already lost (to Boston?! In Salt Lake?!) yesterday. Today Gotham must play a surprisingly frisky Denver in Centennial. Tomorrow we get Washington here and San Diego has to play in the dour confines of Lumin Field.

If results go the right way this weekend Monday morning could see the Thorns in second only four points behind Gotham.

Hmmm…

Last meeting: March 13, 2026, Audi Field, Washington D.C., 0-1 Thorns win.

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John Lawes

Soccer-obsessive. Stats geek. Thorns supporter. Former Slide Rule Pass and Stumptown Footy Thorns beat writer. One of those people who's "often mistaken but never wrong"...

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