The moment I saw the formation I groaned in a way I hadn’t when I saw the XI. Which is not to say I cheered when I saw the XI, exactly…
…but it wasn’t immediately a “What fresh Hell is this..?” thing.
Obviously three in back. But were Reyes and McKenzie (or maybe it was Obaze?) wingbacks in a 3-5-2, with Fleming or Moultrie up front alongside Castellanos? Not very much attack in there, so Ken’s going to sit in a mid block and counter? Grind it out, bring on Tordin and Turner late, try and nick the road win 0-1?
Then I saw the formation.
Oh, Christ.
A 5-4-1? Castellanos stranded alone up top, Hina-san and Moultrie as a double pivot with Moultrie and Fleming outside mids and Reyes and McKenzie as “wingbacks”. A low block with nothing but grind out the scoreless road draw?
You gotta be shittin’ me.
This club hadn’t kept a clean sheet in the eight previous matches, so playing for the scoreless draw from the whistle with a team that has firmly established the likelihood of shipping goals is not really a “plan”. It’s more like a “hope”, but as the old Army saying goes, no plan – or hope – survives contact with the enemy.
And in the 10th minute that contact happened:
Classic Thorns defensive derp; Gotham’s Mandy Freeman sent the cross in with the both Hiatt and Perry ballwatching. That allowed Purce to slide between them and head the ball past a stranded Arnold for the matchwinner.
Because the Thorns had nothing going forward.
Nothing.
Not a goddamn thing.
“Next to nothing” is being ridiculously kind. Castellanos had a cute little lob in the 4th minute that was so short that Berger – who was fifteen yards off her line! – barely had to wave to knock it down. Turner had a nice headed goal off a 62nd minute corner kick that was called back by a brilliant piece of method acting (“Long Day’s Journey Into Flop: A One-Woman Divertissement by Emily Sonnett”).
And that was it. When the original “plan” met Midge Purce’s head this club, in this match, was already in the coffin. The other two Bats goals were just nailing down the lid.
We’ll go into a bit more detail in the comments
Short Passes
Per OPTA both clubs were tidy with 81 to 82% completion between them. The difference came in the location of the passes, which we’ll get to in a moment.
Momentum? Yeah, well…
What did you think it’d look like? The little foray after halftime was the only real sign of life from Portland, and that was brief and fruitless, resulting in a soft header in the 51st minute that was an easy take.
Here’s Carlisle-sensei with the passing. Portland:
It’s worth adding that when Ken swapped out Obaze for Turner the addition of a vertical threat helped make that little post-halftime burst of blue in the plot above. Not enough, mind, but you could see the difference. But by that time the Thorns were down two and routed.
Gotham:
And as sensei points out; this Gotham midfield is on fire. There’s no shame in being outplayed by them as individuals. The shame is, as sensei also points out, setting your club out in a way that makes it easy for them to outplay you as individuals.
Turnover and over.
Here’s how things are going;
| Opponent – Venue (Result) | Turnovers |
| Kansas City – Away (L) | 38 |
| Angel City – Home (D) | 38 |
| North Carolina – Home (D) | 32 |
| Utah – Away (W) | 25 |
| Seattle – Away (L) | 34 |
| Gotham – Home (W) | 26 |
| Louisville – Home (D) | 16 |
| Orlando – Home (W) | 18 |
| San Diego – Away (D) | 32 |
| Houston – Away (W) | 21 |
| Bay FC – Away (L) | No data |
| Washington – Home (W) | 16 |
| Chicago – Home (W) | 22 |
| Washington – Away (L) | 27 |
| Seattle – Home (W) | 20 |
| Carolina – Away (D) | 26 |
| Kansas City – Home (L) | 35 |
| Utah – Home (L) | 26 |
| Louisville – Away (W) | 28 |
| Chicago – Away (D) | 27 |
| San Diego – Home (D) | 28 |
| Gotham – Away (L) | 30 |
Seventeen in the first half, 13 in the second, while Gotham was being tidy; eight before halftime, then five.
Mallie McKenzie was the Biggest Loser with four, but five other players turned over three times; Harbert, Arnold, Turner, Perry, and Castellanos. Kind of a team effort there.
Two were utterly appalling. Castellanos passed directly to Lavelle in the 15th minute to start a dangerous Gotham sequence that, luckily for Portland, was broken down short of goal. Hiatt’s 72nd minute turnover wasn’t as lucky; it went right to Stengal, who began the attack that ended in her first and Gotham’s third goal. Ouch.
Press!
Eighteenth match tracking the effect of each side’s press. I counted either a 1) turnover (either from a tackle-for-loss or a mishit forced pass), or a 2) forced retreat or drop-pass that killed off a progressive action, as a pressing “win”. If two players were involved in a press each received a half mark (for attempts) and a half credit for successes.
Clearly, Rob Gale had told his troops to sit deep but press hard.
Well, they tried.
Unfortunately for his club Gotham passed around them like the Amoros-coached tika-taka possession squad they are. On the other end Portland was pinned in their own half most of the match, between Gotham’s counter-press and their own lack of pace and slow movement. The results were predictable
| Match time | Gotham presses (wins)(%) | Thorns presses (wins)(%) |
| 0-15′ | 13(12) (92.3%) | 25(11) (44%) |
| 15-30′ | 8(5) (62.5%) | 23(9) (39.1%) |
| 30-45+2′ | 14(9) (64.2%) | 12(6) (50%) |
| First half | 35(26) (74.2%) | 60(26) (43.3%) |
| 45-60′ | 17(14) (82.3%) | 5(1) (20%) |
| 60-75′ | 7(4) (57.1%) | 12(6) (50%) |
| 75-90+6′ | 7(4) (57.1%) | 24(10) (41.6%) |
| Second half | 31(22) (70.9%) | 41(17) (41.4%) |
| Match Total | 66(48) (72.7%) | 101(43) (42.5%) |
My thoughts:
1) This, to me, looks like more of the “what do you do in training?” problem on the Portland coaching staff. The press was 1) aggressive, and 2) ineffective; Gotham passed out and around it with ease. Portland, as we’ve seen so often before, struggled to do the same because of an overall lack of team pace and understanding; far too often people passed to empty space, or had no one to pass to and were stripped or forced to drop. That suggests to me that the Thorns staff didn’t prepare the squad for that they’d meet in Jersey.
2) As usual, Fleming and Moultrie did most of the heavy pressing work. They were also the least successful; Fleming (13 presses, 4 wins), Moultrie (19 and 8).
3) Coffey (14 and 6), Sugita (9 and 2), and McKenzie (9 and 3) were the second line, and also less that effective. Several players, including Tordin, Harbert, Castellanos, Hiatt, Reyes, and Perry, had between 4 and 5 presses. Only two – Castellanos (5 and 4) and Perry (5 and 3) won more than half.
4) Perry was the ball-winning leader; all three of her wins also resulted in a Gotham turnover. Three other players won the ball twice; Castellanos, Hiatt, and Moultrie. Loboa, Fleming, and Coffey hawked one apiece.
5) On the receiving end, Reyes took the most punishment; 9 presses, 7 losses, including 3 turnovers, but much of the squad fared badly, as well:
Arnold was pressed 5 times and booted into touch or to a blue shirt 4 times.
Castellanos (5 presses, no wins, 2 turnovers),
Sugita (6 presses, 5 losses, 1 turnover),
Fleming (7 presses, 3 losses, 1 turnover),
Moultrie (7 presses, 5 losses, 2 turnovers),
Hiatt (3 presses, no wins, 2 turnovers),
Obaze (4 presses, 3 losses, 2 turnovers).
6) The only Thorns who came out ahead were Perry (4 presses, 3 wins, 1 turnover) and Harbert (3 presses, 2 wins). Even Sam Coffey only broke even (4 presses, 2 wins).
Here’s the running tally:
| Match (Result) | Opponent Press (Success) | Thorns Press (Success) |
| Utah Away (W) | 28/12 (42.8%) | 27/15 (55.5%) |
| Seattle Away (L) | 32/23 (71.8%) | 21/15 (71.4%) |
| Gotham Home (W) | 28/20 (71.4%) | 19(15) (78.9%) |
| Louisville Home (D) | 34/25 (73.5%) | 14/8 (57.1%) |
| Orlando Home (W) | 28/17 (60.7%) | 43/24 (55.8%) |
| San Diego Away (D) | 18/18 (100%) | 100/36 (36%) |
| Houston Away (W) | 27/17 (62.9%) | 42/23 (54.7%) |
| Bay FC Away (L) | No data | No data |
| Washington Home (W) | 31(15) (48.3%) | 61(48) (78.6%) |
| Chicago Home (W) | 31(21) (67.7%) | 51(39) (76.4%) |
| Washington Away (L) | 18(17) (94.4%) | 25(12) (48%) |
| Seattle Home (W) | 51(27) (52.8%) | 42(33) (78.5%) |
| Carolina Away (D) | 47(26) (55.3%) | 59(39) (66.1%) |
| Kansas City Home (L) | 43(23) (53.4%) | 50(32) (64%) |
| Utah Home (L) | 44(28) (63.6%) | 64(29) (45.3%) |
| Louisville Away (W) | 54(40) (74%) | 46(30) (62.5%) |
| Chicago Away (D) | 32(18) (56.2%) | 67(39) (58.2%) |
| San Diego Home (D) | 27(17) (62.9%) | 87(61) (70.1%) |
| Gotham Away (L) | 66(48) (72.7%) | 101(43) (42.5%) |
Corner Kicks
Five, all long. Two before the break, three after.
| Time | Taker | Short/Long? | Result |
| 38′ | Moultrie | Long | Into the scrum, cleared out to Lavelle who started a counterattack! |
| 39′ | Moultrie | Long | Headed out of the scrum to the far touchline for a Portland throw. |
| 47′ | Moultrie | Long | Berger swatted away – poorly – but the ball rolled out to the touchline. |
| 51′ | Moultrie | Long | Found Turner’s head, but her soft header went right to Berger; still the best (0.54) Thorns chance of the night, except… |
| 62′ | Moultrie | Long | Turner again, only this time she potted the header! Only to have it called back for a performative “foul” by Sonnett who dragged Hiatt over on top of her. |
Two headers, so 40% of the corners yielded shots. Not a bad result, though no one could foresee the Mistress of the Dark Arts that is Emily “I’m not that goofy, it’s just life being funny” Sonnett.
Player Ratings and Comments
Castellanos (84′ – +2/-3 : +2/-1 : +4/-4) You’re going to notice something across the board; really, really low plus-minus rating numbers.
Not just “low net PMR” numbers, or “low pluses”. “Low numbers” overall, like Castellanos’ total of eight; four pluses, four minuses, net zero. That’s what happens when a team just doesn’t have any of the match. With four shots, and an xG of 0.2? That’s nothing at all, and the low numbers represent that.
Carlisle sensei pretty much nailed it; without anyone to make space around her (or hold up play in front of her) Castellanos got no service and isn’t the sort of player that can create it for herself. The 4th minute chip was cute but short, and she really didn’t have anything else.
Part of that is what her skillset lacks, and part of that is KenBall. But the effect was brutal. The Thorns had little enough for an attack before Gotham, and Ken’s XI left them with nothing at all.
Loboa (6′ – +3/-3) Very young. Very Colombian (meaning she’ll cleat you and grin – oh, sorry, I didn’t see you there, Diego Chara…). We’ll see if she’s any more than that when she gets more minutes.
Fleming (77′ – +1/-0 : +3/-0 : +4/-0) Okay, what I said about Castellanos? Fleming was all that and more; worked like a beast, and spent nearly the whole match chasing phantoms and getting nowhere. When your gaffer gets it that wrong? It’s damn nearly impossible to work hard enough to get it right. If she could have, Fleming would have said “Fuck you, Tabo, I do it myself!” and done that. She couldn’t.
Tordin (13′ – +2/-1) Too little, too late.
Sugita (61′ – +2/-1 : +0/-1 : +2/-1) Well, now we know.
I’m going to write about Hina-san at length, because she may well be the player I’ve come to love best of all the Thorns I’ve been privileged to support over the years.
But no longer. And this was perhaps the saddest farewell of any of them. A dull, muted, underwhelming outing in the ringing emptiness of Red Bull, made even more poignant because I didn’t know, as she trotted off the field, that it would be the last time I’d ever see her in Portland colors.
Had I only known, I’d have wept.
Harbert (29′ – +1/-1) No idea. Looked tall. Probably not here long enough to be invested in.
Coffey (+1/-0 : +2/-1 : +3/-1) When Sam Coffey’s PMR is a net +2? You’re fucking doing it wrong.
Moultrie (+5/-1 : +3/-2 : +8/-3) As close to a “Woman of the Match” as anyone, meaning nowhere close.
Reyes (84′ – +1/-0 : +1/-1 : +2/-1) We might as well discuss the backline here as anywhere. Let’s look at this sequence beginning in the 56th minute, with Midge Purce in possession along the near touchline. McKenzie and Reyes close down on her, leaving Lavelle (and Stengal and Bruninha) tons of space to receive Purce’s cute little backheel flick:
It goes to Lavelle who taps a little pass to Stengal, who Hiatt closes on. But now Purce and Bruninha and Lavelle have all that space if Stengal wants to find them. But…
Stengal choses to turn downfield, and…
…draws three defenders including Sugita, Hiatt, and Coffey (and has pulled Perry off Lavelle for some reason), then turns and runs into the space Hiatt has just opened up.
That’s a fucking acre of space! The Thorns defenders are now completely out of place; Fleming and Reyes too wide, Hiatt, Coffey and Reyes jammed up inside, Turner well behind the play, with Sugita and McKenzie having to cover three Bats.
Plus Stengal has the goal at her mercy if she wants to crack a shot. Who’s gonna stop her? There’s not a Doritos kit within six yards!
Luckily for Portland Stengal passes out wide to Purce (who’s lurking in the deep right corner outside the screenshot above). The Thorns defense has chosen to collapse into the box, hoping perhaps that, up two goals, the Bats will be content to pass the ball around the outside.
Instead Purce drives to the byline, skins Reyes, and bores in on goal. Fortunately for Portland her cross is cleared away for a Gotham corner.
Portland’s defense does this sort of organizational chaos occasionally. In between that there’s individual error, like the Hiatt/Perry ballwatching on the Purce goal, or the combination of poor decisionmaking (Hiatt stepping up just as Shaw slid the ball through to a running Lavelle) and lack of awareness (Perry failing to pick up Lavelle’s run) that shipped the Lavelle goal, the effect is lethal.
It’s a combination of lack of discipline, lack of clearly understood roles, and individual errors. Together, it’s murder, and in Jersey it killed the Thorns deader n’ Chuckles “Horst Wessel” Kirk. I’m not sure we really need to give the backline any more stick; we’ve pretty well summed things up with this.
Torpey (6′ – no rating) Why?
Perry (+4/-3 : +2/-2 : +6/-5)
Hiatt (+2/-3 : +1/-2 : +3/-5)
Obaze (45′ – +5/-0) The best of the backline, so of course subbed off to get more firepower after the break. WTF, Ken? What DO you do in training???
Turner (45′ – +4/-2) We mentioned the nice header. Worked her ass off, but without structure and without other support (i.e. with Moultrie and Castellanos instead of Tordin and Hanks), couldn’t do anything to really change the game state,
McKenzie (+3/-3 : +2/-0 : +5/-3)
Arnold (+0/-0 : +0/-0 : +0/-0) Might have done better with the Stengal goal, though that was a pretty piece of skill. Not at fault on the other concessions, and was solid otherwise. Distribution is still a problem, although it was as much about the field players not finding space or allowing Arnold to be pressed without outlets as it was her.
Coach Ken: What more can I say?
This hot mess dropped your club to 7th, meaning that the final four matches are suddenly nail-biters. You might luck out; two are the league sinkers (Bay FC and Orlando) and the Houston match is here on Decision Day.
But make no mistake; this one was a complete manager fail; a failure of tactics, a failure of team selection, a failure of preparation. You’re not responsible for the injuries. But everything else? That’s on you.
Well, you and your club paid the price.
Yeah, that’s a pretty shitty sort of day, hunh?
- Thorns FC: The Wrath of Marta - October 17, 2025
- Thorns FC: Fuck you, Tabo… - October 8, 2025
- Thorns FC: Up on blocks - October 1, 2025
I didn’t have much expectation that we’d win or even draw this one, and as soon as I saw Castellanos was starting as a lone forward, that smidgen of hope vanished. That’s just not something she’s good at.
We did indeed drop a place in the table, but we were then helped by San Diego losing, with their goal difference and other stats decreasing enough to boost us up a place. It’s always so strange when a team changes position in the standings despite neither earning points nor getting leapfrogged by another team that did earn points, as had happened to us previously by losing to Gotham by three goals. The table is so ridiculously tight that any Thorns season finish from fourth place, and home playoff game, to ninth place, and out of the playoffs, looks entirely possible.
It makes me long for the days when we were contending for FIRST place, not fourth. Will we ever get there again? The longer the Bhathals just kind of let the team drift, the more discouraged I get. For example, we must have had salary-cap space this year, with Sauerbrunn and Sinc retiring and Wilson on maternity leave, but we didn’t use it; I assume Agoos must have wanted to spend to bring in some extra talent but the Bhathals just didn’t want to pay. Disheartening.
P.S. Is your top photo a direct response to the comments on Stumptown Footy suggesting the team now resembles a Pinto on blocks, or did you happen to independently come to the same idea? I once had a friend who proudly talked about his “genuine exploding Pinto” – I sure hope we don’t flame out that badly.
It’s absolutely a shout-out to Sacto Rick at Stumptown, who made that comment about how the match report would be a ‘71 Pinto up on blocks.
I wanted to put something like “photo credit by…” as a caption but the platform won’t let you caption the header image.
But…yes.
The Thorns were beaten by a better team, that was better coached and on their homefield. Plus we saw a vintage Rose LaVelle that looked dialed in for the rest of the year.
I was just curious about the newbies and how they would look. Jayden Perry commented after the match that she and Harbert connected pretty good during the match, but my impression was she seemed to be invisible to the other Thorns. Loboa looks like she could be a Caya Hanks game changer but Caiya came in convinced she could beat anybody and Valerin doesn’t seem sure of that.
Now the Hina trade OMG that really blindsided me, but David Anderson made a convincing argument she needed and wanted this trade. It is true if she is going to make the Nadeshiko in 2027 she needs to play. To me Hina’s future is more important than watching her play part time on this team. Right now LA is a worst team, but Hina should be a full time starter and playing with other Japanese players. I feel bad for Vignola because she comes in on team of players who loved Hina, fans that adored her and next year a roster is almost stacked with good fullbacks. Mallie is getting there and Reyes and Müller are bonified. Vignola is also good, but CB and DM are where we needed help.
And Ken made it easy; nerfing his own attack when anyone who knew the two teams’ strengths would have told him that his only hope for the road point would be 2-2 or 3-3. Our defense was going to leak goals; without the ability to score we were doomed.
Harbert is only here on a six month (i.e. five game) loan. I doubt very much we’ll see enough of her to matter.
Loboa looked very raw, very big and tough (Colombian, so…), and very new. I didn’t see anything else in particular other than a yellow card or six, and certainly not Hanks-like pace.
And Hina…
I understand the reasons. I get it, I really do. And the rational, analytical side of me doesn’t disagree with the motives on either side.
The fanboi side is heartbroken. I’ve truly loved a handful of players over the years for their work and for aspects of themselves. The legends…Sinclair, of course. Heath. Kling. Coffey, Menges. And the quirky and fun ones, like Sonnett. Unique players like Raso, or Brynjarsdottir. Scrappers like Long and Buehler.
But Hina was special in some of all those ways. Beautiful technical skills. Acute field vision. Poise, timing, understanding…everything that makes the beautiful game beautiful.
Combined with a person who was both brave – traveling to a distant land to make her living – and shy, strong and open. I’ve mentioned before that her unlikely friendship with Sinc is just the sweetest thing, the two so very different people finding such a deep and revealing love for each other through the game they both epitomize.
It’s going to be hard to see this squad without her.
Yup! I will never tire of watching Hina highlights on You Tube. She is a delight as a player and a person. I think she resonated with Sinc because of her field intelligence. They had a special bond and mutual admiration.
“other than a yellow card or six” Yeah that occurred to me to watching her, she seemed to have a good natured aggression to her game.
I don’t think we saw anything like nearly enough to know what Loboa’s physical game will be like. Will she be late-career McCall Zerboni or Barbara Banda, using her strength with finesse? Or early-career Shea Groom, out of control and injuring people (including herself)?
I’m of the opinion that all teams need an “enforcer”; someone who can put a shoulder it when needed. But that player or players also need good judgement; it doesn’t help your club to give up dumb fouls or, worse, get yourself sent off.
Which is she? If she gets more minutes this season, maybe we’ll see…